The Reason

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together"....(Marilyn Monroe). I get inspired from many places, numerous people and from quiet moments in nature. Inspiring music touches my soul and people's lives and my own emotions give me unlimited things to write about. I read the above quote from Marilyn Monroe on a friends facebook page. We all can be inspired daily from each other in the most unexpected ways. I just love that about life. I prefer to believe that there is a reason for everything that happens in life. We give life purpose and depth when we appreciate every experience that we go through, including difficult times. Of course it's easy to appreciate life when things are good and flowing nicely. However, its the rough times that make us appreciate the better times even more. In addition, the waves of difficulties we all go through help us discover our unresolved hurts, our vulnerabilities and things we still need to uncover about ourselves. This past year has been illuminating for me. I realized that I had preferred to see people for the way I wanted them to be instead of seeing them for who they are. I guess it's the optimist in me (and therapist) that always sees the persons potential versus just seeing who people are in the moment. Of course people always have the potential to change and transform, but we do not protect ourselves sufficiently if we are seeing what others could be instead of who they are right now. My lesson's have helped me understand more profoundly how everything I've been through was for a reason and I repeat daily that I am grateful for those lessons. More importantly, I see myself more clearly and have come to understand profoundly, what builds me up and nourishes me. Regarding reason though...having faith that there is a higher purpose to everything that happens is different than people trying to rationalize and reason things as punishment, bad luck or feeling helpless because they cannot find a reason as to why bad things happen. The word "reason" is two sided and just like the flipping of a coin....you pick which side youre going to go with. Here are some quotes about reason: “Time heals what reason cannot"...(Seneca). “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man"...(George Bernard Shaw). “The heart has reasons that reason does not understand"...( Jacques Benigne Bossuel). In summary, there is meaning to everything that happens when we write and re-write our lives as epic novels with hardships, love, joy, things to overcome and amazing mountains we climb...only to survive and thrive and to find more mountains to climb. I have realized that the words, "I can't, I shouldn't" and "It"s too difficult" are not reasons to give up or give in and in fact just motivate me more than ever to try harder. The reason for living is to conquer our fears and climb our mountains with courage and love in our hearts.

Uncharted

“Life is uncharted territory. It reveals its story one moment at a time"...(Leo F. Buscaglia). I love that life is uncharted territory for me now. What a cool adventure life really is when you allow yourself to be free. Many people do not believe that life is an adventure. Everywhere I travel lately, I've come across many people clearly frozen in their own pain. People's hurts and losses trap them them in an endless sea of sadness and despair. Some are caught up in their own net of anger and frustration which whirls around them and gets vented in occasional storms filled with hurtful words and endless lightening bolts of judgement. If people could just begin to see that they are not trapped at all and that their suffering is self created...then they could begin to embrace their journey versus feeling like victim's. The path of pain and suffering only brings more of the same. It truly is an infinite cycle of pain if that is what one chooses to perpetuate. Being free means gratitude, love and forgiveness. I can clearly see who is trapped and who is free, just by looking into someones eyes. The choice is always yours. While hiking today with my kids, I asked them what their three secrets to life are. My youngest said..."hiking, playing with toys and love." I adore his list because it's so true to his 5 year old perspective, yet such wisdom from such a young soul. In fact, children can teach us a lot. By the time children reach adulthood, they have been conditioned, preached to and filled with other people's distorted perspective's about reality that they forget that as children, they too believed at one time that life was an uncharted adventure waiting to be explored. Who ever said by the way that life would be pain free? Of course pain comes with the territory. We feel it, explore it and move on when we're ready. Getting stuck in our own quick sand of pain helps nobody and prevents movement. I have been stuck before and I had to work hard at getting out of my own quick sand. It wasn't easy and sometimes, I thought that I'd never get out. I never gave up and with that....I learned to never give up on myself. I asked my daughter what her three secrets to life are and she said..."trust yourself, never give up and love your family." She has learned a lot lately about never giving up. She learned how to ride a bike this summer, hiked a very tough mountain two days ago and learned how to kayak alone yesterday. Each time that she cried to give up, I pushed her to continue and she found the strength to keep going until she conquered her own fears. She is learning to trust herself more than ever. I marvel every day at the beauty life has to offer if you just open yourself up to it. If you choose to stay stuck, then okay....but know that you too can free yourself when you're ready. “Laugh at yourself, but don't ever aim your doubt at yourself. Be bold. When you embark for strange places, don't leave any of yourself safely on shore. Have the nerve to go into unexplored territory"...(Alan Alda).