Count Your Blessings

"God will not permit any troubles to come upon us, unless he has a specific plan by which great blessing can come out of the difficulty"... (Peter Marshall). It's holiday time and I heard the song "Count Your Blessings" today. The theme of gratitude was already on my mind, so the song just seemed very fitting. I have really been thinking long and hard lately about why things happen and truly being grateful for the twists and turns I've been blessed with. Over a week ago, I flew to Connecticut to see clients. When I walked into my house, I intuitively felt that something was wrong but I ran to shower since I was running a little behind schedule. The cold shower tipped me off that something was definitely wrong. I headed to the basement to check things out and much to my surprise, my entire basement was flooded in 3 inches of water. Water was pouring out of my water heater from the bottom. I remained pretty calm, called a neighbor to help me turn the water off and I turned my focus back on my busy schedule. I called the insurance company in between clients, slowly pulled wet things out of the basement and eventually got hold of the insurance and a company specializing in water clean up. As days went by, my work schedule wrapped up and yet I was still waiting for the clean up crew to work its magic. I had to cancel my California obligations as each day passed and the basement was still in turmoil. I took it all in stride that for whatever reasons, the Universe wanted me here in Connecticut a little longer. Although I've missed my kids terribly, we have all learned various lessons from this experience. I have been so grateful for this pause in my life. I didn't realize it at first, but I had been running so fast between all of my responsibilities that I had lost touch with myself. I hadn't been writing much and I'd felt a little numb spiritually. I needed a re-boot, a renewed perspective and to reconnect with a part of myself I had let slip away. The extra time has given me a very special gift....inspiration. I feel completely re-charged. I dealt with the workers, helped with clean up and spent some time journalling, going to a movie, baking cookies and resting. Even though I had thought that I had plenty of time to think in California, I had still lost touch with some important parts of myself. I am also blessed that in staying here, a drum that I had commissioned to be painted called "The Fleur De Lis"...or otherwise known as the tree of life, was ready to be picked up. The shamanic artist texted me that my drum was ready but that I'd have to actually pick up the drum in Connecticut, since it required a special ritual. She had no idea that I was here. My new tree of life drum ironically symbolizes reconnection which grounds us to who we really are at our core. So, I count each and every blessing. In the midst of something chaotic is something beautiful...in the center of turmoil can be a needed opportunity and an unexpected gift. "Change, like sunshine, can be a friend or a foe, a blessing or a curse, a dawn or a dusk"...(William A. Ward).

A Nice Surprise

"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. And Today? Today is a gift. That's why we call it the present"....
(Babatunde Olatunji). I love this quote because it's so simple and says so much. I posted it on my facebook wall and several people commented that it was in the movie Kung Fu Panda. I didn't remember that actually but how perfect! I just love animated movies because they connect us to our child selves....and hidden in a fun, spirited movie is a very profound quote. I love it! Each day is amazing to me because it truly offers us the gift of new insights, things that we had yet to experience and of course a nice surprise occasionally. Sometimes I just shake my head in wonder when something or someone surprising enters my sphere. Nice surprises indeed. Each person I meet seems to teach me something new or vice versa. I especially like those surprises. One guy I was chatting with told me about hiking trails I had never discovered. The guy was not the lesson...he was a pit stop, but the trails are now some of my favorites! Some guys I've gone on dates with received some much needed free therapy. That was a gift for them. I'd like to say that I'm off duty when I'm on a date, but I am a therapist and it's just a part of who I am. I love trying to understand different perspectives and I ask questions that many would be afraid to ask. I don't ask to analyze, I ask because I'm sincerely interested but in the process...I get guys talking. That's a good thing. Many men I've met admit that they would never set foot in a therapist's office...but there they are at dinner, pouring their life stories out to me. I'm glad that I'm a good listener! It's rewarding for me to help men express themselves. Everyone needs to talk once in awhile and way too many men keep things bottled up. I also love the surprise of meeting like minded souls who inspire me in some way. That always make me feel good. The law of attraction really does work. I met one of the nicest ladies in the sauna at the gym. I'm always happy when we run into each other because we have the most in depth conversations about love and relationships. Her name is Mimi and she is originally from Germany and has been married for 50 years. She has some amazing insights about love and life. I'll write more about Mimi in another article but her bottom line about love in her own words, "Chemistry is everything!" Everyday now, I wake up wondering what surprises are waiting for me. To add to that, it's fun to just add the element of surprise occasionally by doing something unpredictable. Nice surprises await us every day if you choose to notice. That's the beauty in life. "Well, we all like things to be predictable, don't we? We expect things to be safe and to keep on happening just the way they always have. We expect the sun to rise in the morning. We expect to get up, survive the day and finish up back in bed at the end of it, ready to start all over again the next day. But maybe that's just a trick we play on ourselves, our way of making life seem ordinary. Because the truth is, life is so extraordinary that for most of the time we can't bring ourselves to look at it. It's too bright and it hurts our eyes. The fact of the matter is that nothing is ever certain. But most people never find that out until the ground suddenly disappears from beneath their feet"...(Steve Voake).

Find Your Way

"Whether you think you can or think you can't - you are right"...(Henry Ford). Everyone faces some fears about taking risks and trying new things or developing talents that remain hidden and untapped. I have worked with many people throughout the years who were terrified to leap out into the unknown with their secret dreams of writing, singing, helping others, dancing, painting, and so on. The only thing stopping them was themselves. Sure sometimes, they had parents or spouses who fed their fears...spewing propaganda and fear based messages like, "Get your head out of the clouds," or "The sooner you get realistic about things-the better." When others have that much impact on you, they are just tapping right into your own fears and those fears spread like a wild fire. In reverse, once you confront your fears and push through them, nobody can stop you from pursuing your dreams. I've heard excuses like, "I can't go back to school because I don't have the money," or "I never have time to dedicate to my dreams." There is simply no truth to those statements. As the saying goes...when there is a will, there is a way! Nothing can stop you once you believe in yourself. I had to put myself through college and grad schools. Sure, there were moments that I was exhausted from working up to three jobs but I pushed on. It took me longer than most to finish my undergraduate degree, but in the end who cares how long it took. The excuses are self imposed road blocks. Sometimes it feels easier to stay stagnant and safe yet the price you pay is more than you know. If you give up on your hopes, talents and dreams, then you become less of who you were meant to be. Boredom sets in, anger and resentment for life can take over and self loathing may become such an essential part of your being that the talents and dreams disappear completely and not even a shadow of your true self remains. You only gain by investing in yourself and in fact, you lose so much if you don't nurture your hopes and dreams. The most inspiring stories are those of people who risked everything to follow their hearts. I studied Henri Matisse this week for an art program to teach children about famous artists. Henri Matisse was a lawyer and had pressure from his father to be a successful attorney. Due to an illness, he was laid up for awhile and his mother bought him art supplies. He discovered a true love of art and decided to study art in Paris, which greatly disappointed his father. He later described art as "a kind of paradise." He followed his passion regardless of pressure and expectations and he found his bliss. That is what it should be like....that each one of us settles for nothing less than finding a piece of paradise. So, if there is something that you keep putting off...joining an art group, taking a class, writing, or pursuing a new job...don't let your fears stop you. Take one step toward embracing your dreams and find your bliss. "I quit being afraid when my first venture failed and the sky didn't fall down"...(Allen H. Neuharth). "If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced"...(Vincent Van Gogh).