"By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest"...(Confucius). “The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them"...(Thomas Merton). Once you really fall in love...the person leaves such an imprint that even if the relationship falls apart at some point, they always remain in your heart. Nothing can ever erase the bond that has been forged between individuals. Time can eventually shift the imprint but you always carry them with you in what you learned, the love you shared and the memories that connect you. I have learned though that the past is meant to be our teacher. Once we have really understood the lessons, then we are released from the past and are allowed to move forward. This includes lessons we have learned in all various relationships, not just partnerships. For the first time in my life perhaps, I am finally living in the present moment. For many years throughout my life, I had either been dwelling in the past or dreaming of my future. Those moments were necessary to grow and reflect about all that I had been through and experienced. I felt compelled to profoundly understand the choices that defined me for so many years and decide what I really wanted to attract and create for my future. I needed to delve deeper into myself more than ever! If you don't know yourself, how can you know what you'd like to attract in your future? The idea of 'The Secret," attracting whatever your heart desires is amazing, however people often have no idea how deep seated pain and fears are still getting in the way of attracting what they want. If you are still carrying threads of unworthiness then attracting what you desire may prove difficult because your pain creates hidden road blocks. In my life, the moment is finally at hand and it feels good to look around me and watch all of the things I had wanted to bring into my life, begin to unfold all around me. It's also freeing to no longer be chained to the past or endlessly dreaming of the future. The present moment had been so painful through times in my life, that my only saving grace was to cling to a possible future, endlessly dreaming and hoping of things to come. Dreaming and hoping is a wonderful thing. Without dreams, hopes and wishes...there would be no magic to life. Even songs like "When I Wish Upon a Star" and "Somewhere Over The Rainbow," tap into the beauty of wishes for a better future. Being in the moment means allowing new people, experiences and lessons to occur on a daily basis. It really is so freeing to be utterly in the present moment. Regarding all of the people we have loved in various relationships, they remain forever in our hearts as we navigate ourselves through the present. My reflections lately include honoring the impact I have had on people throughout my life as well as being truly grateful for every relationship and lessons in love I have ever had the privilege to learn. Some of those lessons in love included loss, sadness and tears but with each tear shed, I have learned more than I ever realized possible. I've awakened to so much about myself that had previously been hidden and for that, I have grown tremendously. Those who stay jaded and bitter from past hurts surely navigate themselves into a future of more pain until they allow healing to occur. “Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action"...(Peter F. Drucker).
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