Maybe-Definitely

"All of our unhappiness comes from our inability to be alone"...( Jean de la Bruyere). A friend told me about a song called "Maybe" by Sick Puppies, since he knows how much I love inspirational songs. The song is all about change and needing to walk alone sometimes. The song certainly could be my anthem for the past year of my life. The song also describes the lives of many people I have encountered over the past year as well. Interestingly, the same day I listened to the song for the first time, I received a text from a client saying that she realized that it was time for her to walk alone, finally letting go of dysfunctional relationships. I told her about the song and she instantly fell in love with it. I have spoken to so many people in transition over my career. Many individuals eventually face their deepest fears and insecurities about being alone. People often fill voids in themselves with others. They are looking for happiness outside of themselves and end up unhappy and frustrated. Happiness must be found within first. It's impossible to find what you are missing in others. The lesson is to explore the missing parts of yourself in relationships with others and learn how to develop those traits in yourself. If you cling to others out of dependency, then fear is dictating the union, not love. Many will say that they are hanging onto a person out of love because their rationalization makes denial possible. Who honestly wants to admit that a relationship is dysfunctional and that they keep someone around because they are terrified of being alone. That's tough to admit. It's humbling however to face one's own part in relationships built and founded on mutual insecurities. Maybe it is time to really look at who you are and what you really want in your relationships. It does not always mean that relationships have to end but it does mean that relationships need to change. No matter what, it is important to follow your own path which includes getting to know who you really are. Walking alone is essential in that process, otherwise you may be reacting and behaving in relation to what others want and expect from you. Again, you can walk alone at times even in a relationship because you walk away from the old patterns. Once you risk rocking the boat, you allow room for yourself and your partner to grow and you discover yourself along the way. It's difficult to grow and spread your wings when you may have confined yourself to self imposed parameters. It's as if people construct small boxes they reside in. Then they get married and the marriage goes into the box too. Then the career goes into the box and all of the roles one plays. Even religion gets added to the box or perhaps creates another box and before you know it, you are defined and imprisoned in small boxes, living your life with rules, guilt and limits. Maybe just maybe....people are afraid to break out of their boxes. Freedom is scary because then one must walk alone, defining the journey on their own, not allowing the box and thus everyone else to control them. People often would rather abdicate their power and complain endlessly about it rather than becoming empowered and breaking free. Maybe just maybe though, the box becomes tiring and restricting. Breaking out becomes essential to breathe, to fly and to truly become the person you are meant to be. Here are some inspiring quotes about walking alone. "I love to be alone. I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude"...(Henry David Thoreau). "It is far better to be alone than to wish you were"...(Ann Landers). "The soul that sees beauty may sometimes walk alone"...(Johann Wolfgang von Goethe). So maybe, definitely it's time to break free of the boxes you created so that you too can discover that life is full of endless possibilities.

MAYBE: Sick Puppies

Maybe I'm a dreamer
Maybe I'm misunderstood
Maybe you're not seeing the side of me you should
Maybe I'm crazy
(Maybe I'm crazy)
Maybe I'm the only one
(Maybe I'm the only one)
Maybe I'm just out of touch
Maybe I've just had enough

Maybe it's time to change
And leave it all behind
I've never been one to walk alone
I've always been scared to try
So why does it feel so wrong
To reach for something more
To wanna live a better life
What am I waiting for?
'Cause nothing stays the same
Maybe it's time to change

Maybe it's hopeless
(Maybe it's hopeless)
Maybe I should just give up
(Maybe I should just give up)
What if I can't trust myself?
What if I just need some help?

Maybe it's time to change
And leave it all behind
I've never been one to walk alone
I've always been scared to try
So why does it feel so wrong
To reach for something more
To wanna live a better life
What am I waiting for?
'Cause nothing stays the same
Maybe it's time to change

And maybe it's time to change
And leave it all behind
I've never been one to walk alone
I've always been scared to try

And maybe it's time to change
And leave it all behind
I've never been one to walk alone
I've always been scared to try
So why does it feel so wrong
To reach for something more
To wanna live a better life
What am I waiting for?
'Cause nothing stays the same
Maybe it's time to change
'Cause nothing stays the same
Maybe it's time to change

Being A Tomboy

My seven year old daughter is perhaps one of the biggest tomboys I have ever seen. She wears boys clothes and is often mistaken as a boy. Many people say, "Ahhh-look at your three boys." She use to love it when people thought she was a boy. She is a girl who just happened to have been born with a lot of masculine energy. She's a natural at sports and can wrestle her brothers easily. Something lately has been shifting in her however, a stirring that is slowly growing, attempting to acclimate to the feminine body that she was born with. She asked to have her ears pierced last month (which I complied with) because she decided that it was time that others could see that she is a girl. She wears those earrings with pride. She listens attentively when people talk about their daughters having been big tomboys as kids only to turn into the biggest girlie girls once they are adults. She woke up this morning and insisted on making all of the boys and myself breakfast. She spent hours making anything everyone requested from bagels to pancakes. She clearly loved taking care of everyone. I smiled to myself knowing that some female energy is taking hold. I told her though, that if one of the boys dared to be rude or doesn't say thank you let alone complain, you tell them that they can just get up and make their own breakfast! Too many women think that serving others also means putting up with rude behavior. Heck no!! Serving others is a gift and needs to be appreciated, otherwise don't hesitate smiling and firmly saying "if you complain-that will be the last breakfast I ever cook for you." So many women do way too much for men then get their feelings hurt when the guys are rude. Rude behavior should not be rewarded, ever. No need to get all wounded about it, just refuse to bend over backward for that guy. A lot of women actually act masculine (by doing, chasing and giving) early in dating without realizing it. It does feel good to give but women need to sit back and receive. In addition, men like to feel needed and as if they have a job, so let them give. I know women who have baked cookies, made soup and put together care packages for guys they just started dating. Big no-No's!!!! Women need to embrace their inner tomboys more. The tomboy in me came out in my adult years. I was a bit too timid and insecure as a girl to fully allow the tomboy in me to blossom. As I grew in my confidence, the tomboy part of me naturally came bubbling forth. I love sporting a baseball cap and my big hiking boots. I take risks, certainly assert myself and nurture the masculine in me which makes me feel much more balanced. Sure, I can dress up like a girlie girl and bask in feminine energy but watch out because hiding behind all of that femininity is a very strong woman. My grandmothers were strong women too. Both of them were business owners and they had to be in charge of everything when the men went off to war. My mom had to find an inner tomboy because she raised my sisters and I for many years without a man around. In fact, if you look at history, women throughout the ages had to secretly be tomboys to raise kids, hold down jobs, tend to farms, cook, clean and just about everything else because men were off hunting, in the military or at work. Many men perished in wars and battles which left women completely alone to be the heads of households. Now, divorces make women uncover their inner tomboy because they have to find the strength to juggle being mommies as well as learning how to tend to the car, fix just about everything and all that it takes to run a household alone. Although I like that my daughter enjoyed making breakfast for everyone, I equally nurture my boys to do the same thing. My kids are hopefully learning that boys and girls don't have to be restricted by gender roles at all. Boys can be nurtured to feel, express emotions and help out around the house and girls can be tough, rough and play as hard as any boy can. Even though my daughter is a tomboy, she changes clothes several times a day and actually chooses her boy t-shirts carefully and with pride. There is some girl in her after all. We are all a little like the picture my daughter chose for this blog. The pink tree changes considerably throughout the year depending on the season. In the summer it is green and full then loses its leaves in the fall. In the winter it is covered in snow and in the spring, new life unfolds and the pink emerges. We are all multi faceted and have different sides that spring forth depending on various factors. I'd like to think that all women are really tomboys. Some though are too insecure and have not yet discovered their hidden tomboy, full of potential inner strength. "I've always been a very outdoors sort of girl. I'm more a tomboy than a girly girl'...(Yvonne Strahovski). "I've always been like that. I was a tomboy when I was a kid, so I was always playing baseball and basketball and football and stuff as a kid with the boys"...(Catherine Bell). "People think I'm trying to make a fashion statement because I never wear a bra. It's really that I'm a tomboy at heart"...(Cameron Diaz). "Well, because I'm naturally a tomboy, when I have sleepovers with girls, they end up going home and crying"...(Alexa Vega).

Just A Dream

My kids influence my music choices sometimes. Yesterday, they insisted that we listen to the top 10 songs on an XM station. The number 2 song this week is "Just A Dream," by Nelly. I love all types of music and hear some incredibly inspiring words in pop, rap and reggae music. Even Tupac had some interesting things to say about his observances and experiences of life. I loved the song by Nelly instantly. It's about losing somebody you love because you didn't perhaps give the relationship your all and how lost he feels without her. Lessons in love often deal with heartache. People's defenses keep them all armoured up and affect how much love they can give and receive. How much armour is enough? I have found that culture as well as upbringing and even the location you live affects how much armour you have. People also use vices as armour, which are very prevalent in our society. So many women have disclosed to me how they used control as their armour. Many women fear being vulnerable, often for good reason after being exploited and hurt by men in their past. Our history has also suppressed women which is why the women's lib set out to make women stronger. The problem is that women mistake being in control as power. Being dominant is masculine and yet women end up frustrated in relationships because they yearn for the man to be a man but can't let go of needing control. That will only lead to a power struggle. It's healthy for a woman to resolve their internal power struggle and to find her voice and her confidence. Once a woman truly owns her masculine side, then and only then can she be confident being feminine. It actually takes great strength for a woman to step back and to allow a man to be the man in a relationship. Now, some men are weak and don't want to be in charge. They may complain about dominant women, but secretly keep attracting them because it's what they can handle. A truly confident man will walk away from a woman who tries to dominate him. Some women want docile, compliant men and fear a strong partner, so they keep attracting men who are submissive. A truly strong woman would never want to dominate a man....she is soft on the outside and fiercely strong on the inside. A strong man has made peace with his feminine side (his emotions)....he exudes masculinity but never seeks to dominate a woman because he truly adores the feminine spirit. Back to why both men and women lose people they love because they were just too defensive and guarded to give the partnership their all. Upon reflection, you learn the valuable lessons about why you were too afraid to be vulnerable to give and receive love. It's the ultimate life lesson and one of which may take continued reflection for many to process. In the meantime, like Nelly sings about in his song....lost opportunities in love are just like dreams, there to remind you of your fears, of possibilities and to help you grow. The final lesson? Well, like the local mountains recently which were magnificently snow covered for less than a month....once the snow melted however we are left with only a glimmer of a memory that snow ever topped those mountains. Much like a dream or a past relationship that remains with us as a picture in our minds....still beautiful and a reminder that the past is our greatest teacher. The lesson, to hopefully not make the same mistake next time....so that our hopes and dreams can become a reality.

Dancing Around Intimacy

"Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex"...(Barbara Cartland). So, the entire relationship and dating arena is something I get numerous texts, calls and e-mails from clients about frequently. Obviously, dating and love is big business, when countless books are written about it. Men are trying to figure out women and women are exacerbated with men and yet everyone keeps searching for love. Ironically, today the dating guru's on both sides said the exact same thing. The theme from both camps today....stop chasing someone who says "we are just friends" or someone who keeps you around as a friend or pretend partner. The male side told men bluntly, that if a woman says she is just your friend, then she is just not feeling attraction for you. He is correct that the more a guy keeps pouring on his undying love and affection after she's already put up a wall, the more the woman feels completely turned off. The same goes for the opposite camp as well. The only big difference is that often, men can enter into what appears to be a relationship, only to say "hey-we are not in a relationship." meanwhile, that guy could have been calling the girl every day, sleeping with her, introducing her to family and friends...yet in his mind, they are not in a relationship. No wonder women get confused. Men get confused too, when a woman wants to hang around with a guy all the time and have him do nice things for her, only to be told "I value you as a friend." Now, I admit, that in high school....I did that to guys. I really wasn't playing games though. I did like the male attention but truth be told, I was just too terrified to be in a real relationship. The scary truth though is that real grown-ups, meaning the over 35 set are terrified too. I've read through hundreds of profiles and they all say the same thing, that guys are looking for a relationship. I do my homework when e-mailing and chatting with men and most of them are looking for flings...or they are looking for women who are mean and aloof. They say otherwise in their profiles but once you look at their history, they seem attracted to women who cheat, lie and make them work for it. Why in the heck would men want that? Because, they fear real intimacy and they only feel safe in relationships that keep them slightly off balance. Women do the same thing. They spout in their profiles about wanting romance, love and a steady mate but they go for the jerks...the one's that make them work for it because they are insecure and fear real closeness too. The whole thing is a darn shame. Nice men and women are left with not so nice partners because everyone is afraid to get close. Part of that is people fear vulnerability and others just don't feel that they deserve better. It's a scary thing to open your heart and to get that back in return, so instead the dance of intimacy continues where people keep a huge arms length from each other. When one person comes forward, the other backs off and vice versa. The dance frustrates the heck out of many men and women, but the dance keeps going anyway. Some people wake up and refuse to participate in the old dance but then it becomes quite a challenge to find others brave enough to dance cheek to cheek with without the old moves of distancing and bowing out. The dance of intimacy is why so many people repeat old patterns, playing games and still end up with the same result even after switching partners many times. Some people grow and wise up as to what they need to address in themselves to create a new dance, one that allows closeness and a true heart connection. On a final note, even married couples play games and create a dysfunctional dance to avoid real intimacy, so this is not just about dating couples. "Games are a compromise between intimacy and keeping intimacy away"...(Eric Berne).

He Says-She Says

“I don't care if you're four feet tall and have one eye. If you can make women laugh consistently and get those good feelings flowing through them, they'll love you"...(David DeAngelo). "A man who wants to give needs a woman who is willing to receive. And for most of us, love only feels like it's happening when we give"...(Rori Raye). I received my daily e-mails from the various dating guru's today. Of course they try the hard sell for people to buy their e-books and practically install the fear of god in you if you don't buy their programs. Now, people do not need to buy those programs but do often need some coaching when it comes to dating and relationships. I am a therapist and all I can say is even after counseling many hundreds of men and women and logging in countless hours listening to both sides discuss their relationship issues, I am still learning more every day. The male advice today: to never tell a woman how you feel. Hm mm....at first I couldn't believe it, the last thing men need is reinforcement to stay closed off emotionally. Then I read further and really processed the advice that he was dishing out. Essentially what he is saying is that when men say what they are feeling too soon, they kill the chemistry and come across too needy. He advises that men show how they feel, not say how they feel. The only part I disagree with is he believes that a guy stepping things up physically with a woman expresses how he feels. That depends on the guy. Some men can absolutely be physical with a woman and have no feelings for her. In fact, I have read many articles that say a woman should not assume a man has feelings for her just because he's sleeping with her. Other than that though, he is correct that somehow, for some reason, it creates better chemistry when a man does not say how he feels. Women like mystery and we like to have to wonder a little bit. That goes back to the fact that men show how they feel in the things they do for a woman. I've had countless guys reinforce that message to me, that they show the women they care about how they feel in all of the things they do for her. Once a couple is committed however and certainly once married, then some of the mystery is gone and it does seem appropriate for a man to express his feelings verbally. A man never has to go overboard though with his verbal expression and often a little goes a long way. Some problems occur however when men don't express themselves verbally and they stop doing things to show they care. Many women have complained to me that they don't seem to get any validation from their spouses that they care. Some men have related to me that they had wanted strong women so they married women who appeared more assertive and independent. Turns out that they were deceived by the assertiveness and those women turned out to be controlling and their assertiveness was just a facade hiding their fears and insecurities, perhaps more so than the obviously insecure women. Women also marry men who are wolves in sheep's clothing. Some men while dating shower women with attention and romancing but once they are married, these men become aloof and downright emotionally abusive. I guess that the saying..."if it seems too good to be true, then it just might be" could be correct after all. These dating sites give all sorts of advice for men and women to catch each other. The female site today advertises, "Let every man love you." The point of her advice...date as many men as you want, even if you have a boyfriend because a woman should not take herself off the market until she has a ring on her finger. It goes back to the fact I've repeated that men are trying to get women for the short term and women are trying for the long term. Not to say that there aren't guys sincerely looking for commitment too as well as women out looking for flings. None of the advice though asks men and women how they really feel and what they really want. Both male and female dating guru's do admit that you have to ultimately be comfortable with yourself to attract a healthy partner. I couldn't agree more. The female guru takes a supportive approach and advises women to put themselves on a pedestal and then to attract a man who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. The male guru practically berates men and basically says, "don't be a wuss and fake it until you make it." On a final note, I've had over 3,500 hits on my dating profile in six months which is more than I've had on this entire blog in a year and a half. Hm mm, I'm not sure what that says exactly except to quote some advice I received from one man on a dating site, "It's a numbers game, keep it simple and don't forget to have fun." Sometimes, that's easier said than done though....but when guys wink and e-mail me on Match who call themselves "tongue" or "psychoman"...you can bet I'll keep on looking.

Seeing Through The Dark

“Carve a tunnel of hope through the dark mountain of disappointment"...(Martin Luther King, Jr.). Whenever I meditate or do yoga, I always feel so much more grounded and centered. By going to a quiet place within, we see and feel things with clearer perception. Today I journeyed (Shamanic version of meditation) and went to yoga, so I finished the day with increased clarity. The darkness to me is the place we visit in dreams, daydreams and in our moments of silence. It's as if we see so much more clearly when we close our eyes. Our eyes and minds often play tricks on us, telling us stories and versions of truth that are not true. But, when we silence our minds and go within, we can feel the truth. I especially find this to be true with the people I meet. They may present themselves one way but something just doesn't feel right. Often people over ride their intuition with rational and end up hurt or exploited by people they should have never trusted. In addition, you just know that it's time to move on and let someone go from your life when you continue to feel worse in their presence. Of course, some relationships may need some work but continued pain is your gauge that something needs to be addressed or that the relationship is over. "The most valuable kind of discernment is emotional rather than intellectual. You will know who someone is by how you feel in their presence"...(Eric Francis). People often get disappointed by relationships or circumstances, but those experiences are meant to teach and often lead you to reevaluate, hope and dream until you reach your desired destination. Trust and intuition lights the way though. I remember when I was looking for a home in Connecticut. My intuition absolutely woke me up almost instantly, telling me that the time had come to sell our present home and look for a larger house (I was pregnant with my third child at the time). My only problem is that once I realize change is occurring, I get inpatient with the process. I initiated the hunt for the new home and started the process of getting our home on the market. I spent weekends going to open houses, had a realtor show me even more houses during the week and spent many hours on the Internet combing through homes. In each home I went to, I tried to imagine what it would be like living there. I was trying houses on, so to speak, trying to find the right match. It's not unlike dating actually. Some homes I knew the moment I saw them that they wouldn't fit and others, I'd get excited, wondering if this might be the one. I was getting to know me in the meantime....figuring out what I really wanted and learning to trust my intuition completely. It was tough for me because I would get inpatient. There were times I was willing to settle for a house that just didn't fit, because it was good enough. Something or someone would intervene however and guide me away from settling. The hunt continued. I finally found the right house and even though I loved it, I made excuses about how the home wouldn't work and I continued looking. The fact of the matter was that when the time was right, everything fell into place. Eight months after I began my search...I went back to the home that seemed perfect and this time everything felt right. Our home received an offer at the same time we made an offer on the new home and everything went relatively easily. I trusted my intuition completely from the beginning...but I had to learn to trust the process. This applies to relationships, jobs or just about anything in life. Seeing through the dark for me means seeing with one's heart but allowing the fact that the entire picture has yet to unfold. It is a message that came to me while hiking and journeying today, reminding me ever so clearly that answers will reveal themselves in time. My lesson....to always honor how I feel, to stay true to my hopes and dreams and to be patient while the process unfolds. As I look back, those eight months of looking for the house taught me a lot about life. In seeing so much of what I didn't want, I came to cherish even more profoundly, what just feels right to me. I learned that settling is never the answer and just a shortcut which only short changes you in the end. And I learned that time is relative and anything worthy in life is absolutely worth waiting for. "God's promises are like the stars; the darker the night the brighter they shine"...(David Nicholas).

Live-Laugh-Love

"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return"....(Maya Angelou). Okay so we've heard the words, live-laugh-love.....but recently, the beauty and simplicity of those words really hit me. I write all of the time about the gratitude and gift we all have in just being alive. Many people are caught up in their own struggles and drama...so much so that they forget to appreciate the fact that they are breathing, living and waking up each morning with the opportunity for a new day. Living though isn't just about breathing, it's about really enjoying the opportunity to live life and to share a vast array of experiences. “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive"...(Howard Thurman). I've also decided that there is humor all around us, especially in the daily things. I don't think it's funny to make fun of others at all....but it's humorous to laugh with others and to make light of the crazy things in life. While at Disneyland riding the Pirates ride, my five year old pointed to the skeletons and told his sister, "Ya know- those skeleton pirates use to be alive, then they died....then they were made into a ride." That made me laugh so hard. My kids give me a lot of great material to laugh about! Reading profiles on dating sites are pretty funny as well. I always appreciate the profiles that contain something humorous on purpose. One guy wrote as his profession, "Boss of me." Another guy wrote as his education history, "I'm a smart guy" instead of listing the degrees he's earned. I always joke about how my dating profile reads like a dissertation. A guy gets bonus points just for getting through the whole thing. It sure makes the dating scene more tolerable when you can laugh and make fun of aspects of it. I went to the gym today and have started taking different classes just to vary my workouts. Now yesterday, I went to my first spinning class....and all went well. Today I tried Zumba and the experience was comedy. First, the Latino instructor makes it look easy but this is sorta like a Jane Fonda workout but with lots of booty shaking at the same time, which is no easy feat. It looks great when the instructor is doing it. I didn't look so graceful or exotic while doing Zumba and I'm just amazed that I didn't trip someone or fall on my face because moving your butt constantly to the beat of the salsa music is very hard work and tough to do while moving other body parts. I'm going to keep going to the class because it's a great workout and it's so funny watching myself and one hundred other women attempt salsa like aerobics. Laughing should be a part of our daily lives....because to live is to laugh. This brings me to love. "Love makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place"...(Zora Neale Hurston). Love is the heart of life and colors every breath we take. The journey of love is to risk not being loved in return but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. "Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile"...(Franklin P. Jones). As I get older and wiser, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life, which is why I finally value the words, live-laugh-love. To me, attitude about living, laughing and loving is more important than education, facts, the car you drive, money, or the past. It also doesn't really matter what others think or how things look....the bottom line is how each of us chooses to approach the business of living and it's all right there in your attitude. Attitude about life can shift instantaneously if you choose it to. So, set out on a path of becoming the energy of live-laugh-love and I guarantee that your attitude about yourself and the world around you will improve significantly. “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending"...(Maria Robinson).

My Love is a Song

“Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and cannot remain silent"...(Victor Hugo). It's the first day of the new year and I can't think of a better way to celebrate the new year than to listen to music and honor all of the music that has inspired me throughout the past several years. Music has helped me through very tough times, lifting me up and speaking directly to my heart and soul when I was at my lowest points. Equally, when I'm positive and upbeat, certain songs resonate with my joyful vibe helping lift my spirit higher. Music has an incredible way of setting the tone though. Often, the songs I come across at particular moments speak to me directly, as if a personal message is being sent to me via music. In addition, a certain song can stir up deep feelings and trigger memories. As a teen, I loved the 80's dance stuff because it was just fun. I also always connected with love songs as early as I can remember, not surprisingly. There are songs that have bridged time. I remember listening to the song "Endless Summer Nights" by Richard Marx in the late 80's thinking about someone special and now when I hear it, I am brought right back to that summer and those memories. As a teen, the love song I listened to the most was, "When I'm with You" by Sheriff. The band was a one hit wonder as it turned out, but that song always spoke deeply to me. I wondered while listening to that song, what it would be like to be so in love with someone that I'd feel that way. The song gave me hope about love. I adore the song "Higher Love" by Steve Winwood. That is a classic song that speaks to the desire to experience a love that is above it all, deeper and it's worth waiting for. U2 is very poetic in it's songs about love, desire and relationships. I especially love their songs: "Sweetest Thing," "Elevation," and "Mysterious Ways." Bryan Adams songs are quite romantic and poetic. As a teen I listened to Bryan Adams endlessly at the beach. I just really liked the beat to the music but now I actually listen to the words and wow, Bryan had some incredible things to say about love. His song, "Do I Have to Say the Words" and "Let's Make This A Night To Remember" are very romantic and sexy. Of course people have songs for their weddings, graduations and to celebrate events. Music connects us to the heart of life in some way. This blog was inspired by the song, "I Believe," and music inspires me daily. Here are some quotes about music. “To stop the flow of music would be like the stopping of time itself, incredible and inconceivable"...(Aaron Copland). "After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music"...(Aldous Huxley). "All good music resembles something. Good music stirs by its mysterious resemblance to the objects and feelings which motivated it"...(Jean Cocteau). "All music is beautiful"...(Billy Strayhorn). There are some songs that came from movies that remain with us long after the movie has faded. I still love the song "If Anybody had a Heart" by John Waite, from the movie "About Last Night." The entire movie "August Rush" is about how music speaks to the heart and I still listen to several songs from that soundtrack. A newer song from a soundtrack that I listen to is "When I Look At You," from the movie "The Last Song." I've always loved Amy Grant and most of her songs are about love. A newer artist I recently discovered is Leona Lewis and again, it won't shock you that most of her music is about love too. I do love fun, dance music too. Most of the dance stuff is about sex, which can make for interesting listening as well, depending on my mood. Overall, I just love music....it makes me want to get up and dance, cry, laugh or contemplate myself and life. “Music and rhythm find their way into the secret places of the soul"...(Plato).