Saturday, October 31, 2009

Fake It Until You Make It


In 1992, there I was a college graduate, waitressing and living in New York City. I was considering grad schools, but was still a bit lost, trying to find my way in life. Then I was fired....yes fired as a waitress. Ironically, my boss said that I was not a team player! The reality was that I was miserable as a waitress and that man did me the biggest favor by firing me. The next day, I picked up the New York Times and answered an ad for a private camp counselor at a family owned camp in the Adirondack mountains in upstate New York. Being from California, I did not even know where that was, but the job sounded interesting. I showed up for the interview full of enthusiasm and hope that I would get the job, which would entail going to this family camp for one month and organizing and leading the group of grandchildren in activities. At the interview, the grandparents asked me a series of questions. They asked.....do you hike, play tennis, canoe? Have you led groups of kids on outings, camp outs, and overall been responsible for groups of children ranging in age from 2 to 14? The answer to all of the questions, YES, absolutely! The truth, NO to all of the questions. I knew that whatever I did not how to do, I could figure it out. Heck, I had babysat before, how hard could it be to lead a group of ten or so children? They hired me and there it was......I would have to fake it until I made it. What I was missing in skills, I made up in heart. I made up songs with the kids, quickly learned how to canoe by watching everyone else and tried so hard, that they never even noticed that I was learning on the job. The month was absolutely transforming for me. Hiking as it turned out, really showed me that I could achieve anything. I remember cheer leading the kids up the trail, secretly pushing myself all the way to the top as well. The kids and I really bonded over hiking as we all discovered that we could accomplish more than we ever thought we could. After that summer, the family loved me so much that I was hired as an assistant in their New York City office, which guaranteed that I would be the summer camp counselor each year. I worked for the family for five years while I attended grad schools, finished two masters degrees and finally figured out what I wanted to do with my life. Those five summers with the family in the Adirondacks taught me so much about myself. From the California girl who had little outdoor experience, I turned into an avid hiker, leading the crew of children up many of the highest peaks in New York State, completing over 35 hikes. I really found myself on those trails, discovering that I could do anything I set my mind to and that fear would never lead the way. I discovered an inner mountain girl that had been hiding who could be more resilient and stronger than I ever imagined. The lesson, never underestimate yourself and be willing to push yourself beyond your limits. You can always do more than you think you can. So, next time you are feeling insecure about your abilities, give yourself more credit, be willing to learn along the way, and as I realized.......sometimes you just have to absolutely, positively, fake it until you make it!

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